Scene Four

Roger walks into his disgusting house. Puts some food in the cats dish. “Minoux! Got your favourite girl.” He sits in his lazy boy and eats a can of tuna. While chewing, he grabs the phone and dials the talk sex line.

general sex line introduction recording*

Roger enters his credit card number*

Girl on the line: “Hi Roger...”

R: “Hi Giselle, is Candy working tonight?”

G: “No. We’ve got (insert random names here)

R: “Oh, That’s too bad. We had such a wonderful conversation last night. Did you know they had a great deal on fabric softener at the independent?”

G: “”Mmhmm…. Roger, do you want to speak with me tonight or another girl? You know this is costing you money.”

R: “Ok, can you describe your feet for me again?”©

Robert Character

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Sarah Character

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Rogers Body

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Scene Three

The bus pulls to a stop. Roger, while getting off  says “Well thank you very much my friend. It was a pleasure riding with you today.”

Standing off the bus now he says “Oh, I just remembered, I’ve got a new joke for you today. How can you tell if….” The door closes and the bus pulls away leaving Roger standing on the street.

Roger walks into the grocery store, grabs a cart and gets cat food ( large bag), sees a good deal on something (fabric softener?), and gets 10 cans of tuna. At the cash a girl starts ringing him in.

“Hello my dear, what a lovely hair style you have today.”

Girl: “Oh, thank you.”

Roger: “I really needed the tuna, I’m down to one can in the fridge”

Girl: “It’s $36.96 please”

R: “ And the cat food is a good price. I like getting it here instead of the pet store, because I need to take the bus everywhere.”

G: “Oh, I see, uhm… it’s $36.96 please.”

R: “Oh right, sorry, I got distracted by your pretty face. I’ll pay with my mastercard.”

He hands her his card and turns to the person behind him.

“Sorry, I was just chatting with my friend here. I’ll only be another minute.”

G: “Here you are.”

She hands him back his card and receipt. Roger signs and asks “ Would you like to check the signature, you can never be too careful nowadays.”

G: “Sure.”

She checks the signature and Roger walks out with his bags.©

Scene Two

Roger walking down the snow swept street.

 He waits at a bus stop.  The bus pulls up, he gets on.

He says to the bus driver “Crazy weather we’re having today, huh?  You know winter is my least favourite season, too cold for me. I’m going to move to Texas where I don’t have to worry about the snow. Are you a winter person? Must make driving hard, huh?....Sir?

Bus Driver: “Sir, please take your seat”

Roger sits next to a teen with head phones on.

“Crazy weather we’re having today, huh? You know…”©

Scene One

Roger stands at his mirror pulling out his hair while talking to himself.

“That’s a lovely hairstyle you have today ma’am”

Dropping his hair one by one into the sink and continues practicing.

“Oh what a cute baby, how old…©